Jon and I have asked God for a specific miracle and blessing for a really long time.
We ask in faith and listen as closely as we can for any inspired action to take. We’ve felt an assurance that it is indeed coming but for now “be patient + trust”.
I’m not gonna lie. I thought my patience and trust ran deep. But apparently in my humanness, I have a limit. I feel my patience growing very thin. I want what I want and I want it now.
Jon and I attend the temple every week. We usually go together but because we had other commitments we ended up going separately this week. On my drive there I listened to my usual “temple playlist” full of inspiring, encouraging, and faith building songs. It’s my go-to music on the way to the temple and I normally find myself inspired and totally encouraged.
But this time was different.
Instead of being uplifted, I felt cynical. Instead of inspired, I felt hopeless. I spoke to God in my heart and out loud while I drove…
Why are we not seeing any progress?
Why hasn’t it happened yet?
When will we get what we want?
I want this NOW.
I’ve waited so long.
When will we see what you have promised us?”
WHY, WHY WHY?
WHEN, WHEN, WHEN?
If I could have acted out how I was feeling inside, you would have seen me facedown pounding my fists on the floor in a full-blown fit. It wasn’t pretty.
When I arrived at the temple I took a moment to write down my questions I needed answered:
If you’ve put these desire in my heart, why are they not showing up yet?
Is it me? What do I need to do?
Are the desires of my heart still valid?
Can I feel peace and reassurance in the midst of my storm?
With a prayer in my heart I entered the temple. What an amazing blessing we have of being able to go to such a sacred and holy place on earth. I felt an immediate peace and love just walking through the doors.
After I did my temple work, I took some time to sit in the celestial room. I quietly sat, closed my eyes, and began my prayer to Heavenly Father.
I have to admit, I almost thought I would hear some kind of rebuke for my little temper tantrum I had on the way over. I mean, come on…it was a bit bratty!
Not even in the slightest. The only thing I felt was pure love and understanding.
I could feel God’s empathy toward me. He knows how much I want these things and understands how hard it has been without it. He also knows the big picture of my life. He sees what Jon and I need to grow and become the people we need to be in order to return back to Him.
As so, God requires us to wait on certain things, He requires us to be patient and to learn to trust and exercise our faith.
My prayer with Him in the celestial room that day didn’t reveal when it was all going to happen. He didn’t dish out any details or specifics but He did (once again) reassure me that ALL WAS WELL.
That He hears me.
He knows me.
And that I’m incredibly loved.
Welcome to Being Katie Brave! I’m so happy to have you here. If you’re looking to take better pictures (stress-free!), get the inside scoop on all things Disney World, or be inspired to live YOUR best life (even if especially if it scares you to death) …you’re in the right place. I ’ve written 3 photography books, our family lived at Disney World for 2 years, and wear my heart on my sleeve…all of which would never have come to pass if I didn’t push past my fears and step in the darkness. Join me as I share my adventure of life, one post at a time.